For those who were a little confused about who Dr Kim is, he is my functional medicine doctor, who I described last night, not a GP. It is he who I will be working with from tomorrow on the deep emotional, spiritual, nutritional and homeopathic work.
Ioannis came and picked me up this morning at 10.30 and we went to the hospital. He looked exhausted, having worked until 5 both last night and the night before and not getting to bed until 6am. We got to the hospital for 11am and saw the oncology team to sign the consent forms and discuss the treatment. I gave them the details of Dr Kim and asked them to provide me with all of the information that will help him to work with me most effectively. They are actually being very accommodating and have agreed to copy him into the info that is sent to my GP, which makes life easier for everyone. I read the report from my CT scan and even though I don’t understand the medical language, it looks pretty horrendous. Tumours everywhere of between sub 1cm and 4cm’s.
We were then stuck waiting for hours to see the pharmacist to discuss medication and ensure that they get the dose right, they were a little concerned about liver function as my bloods have shown that some functions are struggling a bit although nothing too horrendous. We didn’t end up getting in to see the pharmacist until nearly 3.30pm, which was very frustrating. I was incredibly hungry and poor Ioannis had had virtually no sleep and no food. We then had another hour to wait while the chemo was made up. I was desperate to eat and as I only live around the corner from the hospital and can’t eat the rubbish that they serve in the shop there, we came home for food. I can’t believe that the only things you can purchase to eat in a hospital are crisps, chocolate and sandwiches. I knew by then that my chemo would take literally minutes to administer and the whole process including the pre-meds would take less than half an hour.
I had to make a couple of calls and so Ioannis went to have a lay down and fell fast asleep. I have had a few enquiries business wise today, which is strange as things have been a little quiet on the business front the past few weeks. It was nice to get my business head on briefly and think about something other than cancer. I didn’t have the heart to wake Ioannis as he was so exhausted and I really wasn’t bothered about going back for the chemo on my own, so I snuck out of the flat, jumped in a cab and went and got it done. I could feel a weird sensation as the drugs first started to go in as the enter the body right next to my heart. I struggled with that a little for a couple of minutes and then it was ok. I can have the PICC line moved away from the heart slightly if it is too close and causing interference, so I will see how it goes. As the chemo itself went in, I laid back and tried to visualise it as a golden, healing light flooding my body. I was just relaxing and having a 5 minute power nap, when there was big thud and my chair felt like it had just broken… Scared the flippin’ life out of me!! Apparently it does that occasionally! So that was it, chemo administered. I decided to walk back and clear my head and get some air in my lungs. It’s about a 20 minute walk home and it was nice to be out in the open amongst people walking home from work.
When I got back to the flat Ioannis was up and was really upset that I hadn’t woken him to take me. He feels very strongly that it is his role to be by my side and be there for me when I am having treatment. I felt really bad that I had upset him but I wanted him to rest as he was so shattered and he needs his strength to be strong for me. I laid down with him to rest and he noticed that I was clammy from my walk back from the hospital and was worried about me. He told me I am not allowed to do that again! I will listen to him and not be so stubborn and independent. This is a big change for me.
we started to watch a film but within about 10 minutes of it starting, a huge tiredness overcame me. I couldn’t keep my eyes open and I felt like the life force had been sucked out of me. I surrendered to the total exhaustion and slept. I woke after a few hours and feel much better now. Other than a horrible chemical taste in my mouth, I feel ok, just a little tired. I have my meeting with Dr Kim tomorrow afternoon, but other than that, I have nothing to do and so will listen to my body and take each day as it comes.
So that’s dose number one administered, 11 more to go over the next 18 weeks. Let’s see what tomorrow brings….. x